Monaloca

Recently, Melina told me “I want to be a mommy when I grow up, just like you!” She and her gang of girls play endless hours of “family” (in addition to “haircut” and “ballet class”) at school My favorite, though, is when she takes this aspiration to daily tasks, and starts pitching in with family life all on her own. She will fold laundry without prompting, and in the morning sometimes apologizes, “Sorry it took me a while to come out. I was making my bed.”

This is probably also due to her temperament and innate desire for organization as much as it is her mimicking me. We also recently hired cleaners to help clean the house twice a month. The first time they came Melina freaked out: “My bed is all mixed up!” (I.e,., it was made, but the pillows were in the wrong spot.) Now, she looks forward to cleaner days. Last week she even made her room a little extra messy and moved her night table, just to see what they would do.

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Even with a recent bout of cold winter rain, spring is definitely the vibe chez Rapoza. Now that Nalani is one, I’m either going to post as we have news or give monthly updates on the whole family, especially my two little crazy monkeys. (Hence the name “monaloca” – should be monas locas, huh?)

Spring is birthday party season for us. It seems that when kids are little all their friends’ birthdays cluster around each other, and we have three spring babes – two who are still small – so it’s especially crazy. In fact, at last count we have one birthday party per week to attend from the first weekend in May through the third weekend in June. That’s a lot of cake and goodie bags.

Melina had fun at Connor’s Adventure Playground party, where she got to paint and hammer into a chair (no nails needed, apparently). Last weekend we all joined Lily at Head Over Heals gymnastics studio, where the kids had fun on an obstacle course and three of us (Joey, Kai, and me) took turns on a trapeze that lands you in a giant foam pit.

Between parties we’ve had time to take bike rides around the block and to meet friends at the park just down the street. Nalani is borrowing a trike with a push handle (for mama) from a friend, and she loves it! Now that the weather’s warmer and we’re out more, we’ve also met some new neighbors – mostly those en route to the park. Melina is also continuing swim lessons with her friend Emma at the Y.

At home and school, Melina has been practicing the sounds all the letters make, and has gotten very good at spelling her name on a piece of paper. Sometimes she writes it backwards, but the letters are always in the right order. She also loves telling us what letter random words start with, and continues to “read” huge stacks (she calls them batches) of books each night before going to sleep.

Nalani is a full-on walker now. She only crawls when she wants to get somewhere really fast and happens to be on the floor already. She loves following her brother and even moreso her sister wherever they happen to go. If they’re in the play tent or their bedroom, she’ll make a beeline towards them, ignoring Daddy and me in the next room.

Our baby (or as Melina calls her, waddler) doesn’t seem to be talking much but we may just be so busy we’re missing words. (Poor youngest child!) She does say “mama” and “dada” quite frequently, and usually associated with one of us but not always the right one. She sometimes says “mo” for more, and seems to be calling milk and water “nana.” She’s also done the sign for milk a couple times, but not consistently.

Our waddler is still one stubborn cookie when it comes to nap time at home. She’s been napping beautifully – a full two hours around lunchtime – at daycare since 11 months. But at home she screams in her crib for 45 minutes then sleeps for 10. And that’s on a good day. She tends to work herself into a state instead of eventually calming down. Nonetheless, we started trying to nap train her (letting her scream it out until she conks out for at least 5 min) but when Joey talked to the doctor about it he just laughed and said “my kids did that too.” Hmmmm.

Well, she’s an awesome night sleeper (8pm to 7:30am, consistently), but still. After we went through Kai only napping in the car I swore I’d train any of my own children to nap in a crib. I did it with Melina. I don’t know if we missed Nalani’s window, or if she’s simply a different kid. In any case, she inevitably ends up napping on one of us (in the Ergo carrier) or in the car or stroller on weekends.

Reports from daycare are that our little girl is also one tough cookie in terms of holding her own. She fights back anytime another kid tries to take a toy from her. (Go figure, she has two older sibs.) But the teachers at daycare also caught her rocking a smaller baby in a swing. She has her sister’s maternal instincts, too! But sorry babe, no little sister for you.

Daddy’s favorite Nalani discovery this month is that she loves having her back scratched, and it’s especially useful for calming her down. Funny thing is, now whenever she gets a little fussy we’ll find Melina with her hand under Nalani’s shirt, scratching up and down her back, saying “Look, I’m calming her!” It’s nice to have little helpers.

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Nalani had fun practicing her walking at playgroup today. This video shows a turn and 17 full steps in a row. She did even more – including quick balance recoveries – but I didn’t catch it on video. She sometimes still walks sideways (just like when she cruises), which I love.

In any case, she’s off!

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Nalani’s definitely taken more steps in a row than in this video, but not frequently. We figure she needs a batchi (Melina’s name for small lovey blanky) in her mouth to help her balance. From May 2, and yes, it’s sideways.

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Late last month we took the girls on a road trip up the coast to visit friends in Mendocino. Melina had only met Julia (almost 6) as an infant, and had never met Miranda (3). She met Cassandra, the fancifully dressed “purple princess” at Uncle Brian’s wedding last summer.

Before our trip I told her, “We’re going to hang out with the purple princess and her little fairy girls!” Melina, who has become quite logical and literal, told me, “She’s not a real princess. And little girls aren’t really fairies.” It didn’t matter. With all the dress-up clothes, the pink, and the dolls (especially of the Barbie variety), Melina was in heaven.

She and the Young girls played together fabulously, which gave Joey and me the chance to catch up with Milo and Cassandra and enjoy their new Fort Bragg house and its two gorgeous acres of land. Nalani, for her part, made do re-arranging their kitchen with tumbling Tupperware towers on the floor.

We also spent some time wandering through the village, contemplating Glass Beach (decided it was too windy and cold), walking along the bluffs, and eating brunch at a Wizard of Oz themed Fort Bragg diner. I even got a chance to meet up with my Mendocino-based cousin Michelle, who I haven’t seen in at least five years.

Since our trip was within a week of Nalani’s first birthday, I asked Cassandra – whose photography business is booming – if she could take some photographs of our littlest girl and the family. (I also asked if she could get photos of just the two girls. They’re ever-moving and in Nalani’s case not fully independent targets, so that one proved difficult.)

We are thrilled with the results (see the full set here), and Melina was thrilled to be able to flit barefoot in the woods with her borrowed wings and sparkly pink wand. Who says little girls can’t be fairies?

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Our little girl ended up with nearly a full week of birthday celebrations. Since her real birthday fell on a Thursday, we treated her to a yummy salmon dinner (one of her favorites!) followed by mini cupcakes for her, Kai, and Melina. Nalani had chocolate with dark pink sprinkles, and as you can see by the photo, she devoured it.

Thursday was also Mommy and Daddy’s wedding anniversary, so we decided to get a head start on the weekend and spend Friday off work, hangin’ with Nalani and each other. We brunched at Sunnyside Cafe, went on a long walk, then were lucky enough to have our one-year-old snooze in her infant carrier (yes, she’s still in it) as we enjoyed late afternoon wine-and-nosh at Wood Tavern. That night we all put on our aprons to frost cupcakes for the big celebration.

On Saturday all sorts of people came to help celebrate Nalani turning one. The biggest feat was my Aunt Sharon and Uncle Ray driving three hours from Clovis – and then back again – just to see our little girl. We were very touched! Grandma and Grandpa and the Roseville cousins also came out, plus the Hindmarshes and some longtime friends of ours.

After we set up the party time a month ago, Nalani started napping at daycare pretty consistently from 11-1. As luck would have it, this was party time. So she was a little dazed for the big event, probably also because of all the people and excitement surrounding her. Melina was also a little off her game due to all the attention for baby sis, but she also reaped plenty of rewards. Just about every one of Nalani’s gifts – the stroller, the shopping cart, even the musical toddler bear – has also become a treasured new toy for Melina to play with. She tells us she’s teaching Nalani how to share.

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Move. Despite crawling and cruising on the early side, Nalani has taken her time with hands-free walking. But today, three days after her first birthday, she took her first teeny tiny steps! (And when I say teeny tiny, I mean it. We’re talking two toe-steps and then a stumble into a crawl. But probably it won’t be long now.) For over a month she’s been cruising with ease and recently started walking while holding onto a grown-up’s finger, sometimes pretty lightly. She also stands hands-free for up to 30 seconds, often while playing with a toy or reading a book, clapping, or best yet, patting her naked belly like daddy taught her.

Play. The world and all its manipulative things are Nalani’s playground. Especially things that live on shelves begging to be taken off or thrown down. Amazingly, she sometimes loves to put them back. She also gets a kick out of taking things (blocks, toys, the remote control) out of a bucket and putting them back in. Right now she prefers shakers, bells, and drums to stuffed animals and dolls. She also loves anything she can push while walking.

Eat. Nalani likes cow’s milk! Exclamation point because when I tried to give Melina milk at 12 months she flat-out rejected it – and all variations (everything from cow’s to goat’s to even chocolate) – for months. With Nalani I wised up and slowly started mixing it with breastmilk in her bottles at 11 1/2 months. By the the time she turned one the ratio tipped towards cow’s milk, and today I gave her a baby bottle full of it, cold. She hesitated (probably because it was cold) then slurped it down.

Food-wise, our baby girl – like our bigger girl – loves all fruit and meat we send her way. Unlike her big sis, Nalani likes a number of veggies, her latest favorite being broccoli.

Nalani’s third tooth (top left) finally popped through about a week before her first birthday, and a fourth (top right) isn’t far behind. (Incidentally, Nalani’s first four teeth have popped at almost the exact same ages as Melina’s first four teeth.)

Act. Nalani’s little personality is starting to shine. She’s always been a super chill little girl. Except when she hits a tired or hungry wall and is not. She’s still happy, playful, and mellow the majority of the time, but will turn on a dime more than ever. She’s already had a her first few throw-the-head-on-the-floor mini tantrums, including one at her party when I wouldn’t let her eat my piece of pizza. (In the end I caved. It was her party, after all.)

Nalani is a great night-sleeper overall but our girl refuses to nap in her crib. Correction: She naps in a crib at daycare, but not at home. With us, she’ll scream for over 45 minutes, working herself into such a state that it would be hard for her to calm down on her own. Until recently we just let her nap on one of us in the Ergo or on car rides running errands around town. But she’s getting too big for it to stay practical.

I’ve started calling Nalani “Little Joey” not only in looks but also in temperament. (Joey is one of the most easy-going people I know most of the time. But if you hit a nerve you’ll regret it. He’s also incredibly stubborn.) But then my mom mentioned that I was the same way as a toddler. We may be in for a “fun” couple of years ahead!

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Happy birthday, Nalani! You may not understand the significance of this day, but your sister and brother are very excited to celebrate tonight with your favorite salmon dinner and cupcakes, and Melina was thrilled to pick out your birthday dress and tights. You clapped in your crib this morning when Kai and I walked in to take you out, and Daddy fed you your first taste of linguica for breakfast. True to your Portuguese roots, you loved it!

We also had fun celebrating your and Maya’s first birthdays with cupcakes and a round of happy birthday at play group on Monday. On Saturday we’ll have grandparents and cousins and a few family friends over for a pizza party! We’ll take plenty of pictures so you can look at them and pretend to remember when you’re older.

Not to be forgotten: Happy fifth anniversary, Joey! I adore you as much as the day we met.

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At Nalani’s birth one year ago my sister and her husband were still debating whether to add a third child to their family. The good ole’ fashioned way still didn’t seem to be an option for them. My sister’s body simply isn’t meant to carry children (though her five-year-old surrogate-born boys prove her eggs are just fine!) By last fall they had decided to adopt a correctable special needs girl from China. They anticipated a wait of up to a year, and expected that the child would be around one, close to cousin Nalani’s age. Amazingly, they received a referral for an 18-month-old almost immediately after submitting their paperwork. Six months later, baby (er, toddler) Ella Wei is home in Roseville with her new, permanent family!

While I know in my sister’s mind it didn’t go “fast,” we on the outside are amazed at how (relatively) quickly and smoothly everything came together. Our own family ventured up to Roseville yesterday to meet toddler Ella, celebrate her second birthday, and welcome her to the family. After just one week in the US, she seems incredibly well adapted, and even ran to give Joey and me big hugs when we said good-bye after a few short hours. She also cried as we left, which is no surprise given the momentous change our little niece has experienced in just a few short weeks.

Welcome home, Ella! When we can’t see you in person, we’ll be following you and your brothers on the Ham family blog.

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When Melina was four months old, our play group ventured over to Sears to have photos taken of all the baby buddies. The result was our “babes in a circle” shot that most of us now have hanging on our children’s walls, and that leaves the kids themselves guessing who’s who as an infant.

Every year since then we’ve tried to get another group shot, with varying degrees of success. This year, at nearly four years, we thought the kiddos might be able to re-create the original circle shot, and that we might somehow be able to capture it with a ladder and our everyday (albeit nice) cameras. We even added baby siblings to the mix. Enjoy!

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