Monaloca

18 months! A two-day belated happy birthday to me and happy half-birthday to our little girl. The biggest change for me this past month is realizing how little baby Meli has left in her. Other moms at the park will say to their toddlers, “Oh, this little girl looks about your age” and I’ll think, “but that kid’s a KID!” Inevitably, the tot in question is just a few months older than Melina.

The biggest changes for Melina all have to do with independence. Even Teacher Mei at daycare likes to comment, “She’s very independent, that one.” Suddenly I’m not always the coolest thing ever – until another kid, even Kai, tries to sit on my lap.

She’s talking up a storm (mostly single words, and she now spontaneously says “PEEzh” when she wants something), opens inside doors all by herself (good for us since she loves to close them), and has thrown a single full-blown tantrum (when we cut off her teeth-brushing after 10 minutes of what was really water play).

The one tantrum aside, Meli does a great job brushing her teeth all by herself, including bringing the stool to the sink and putting her toothbrush back when she’s done. She also puts her clothes in the hamper before bath and sometimes puts any clothes she finds on the ground in the hamper. If she finds a blankie in there, though, she pulls it out.

Melina is fascinated with the straps on her table booster and shopping carts. She’s determined to figure out how to latch them together (she sometimes succeeds) and pull them apart (she doesn’t get the squeezing part just yet). She still adores stickers, dogs, cats, and her brother, and had a blast keeping up with her twin 2.5-year-old cousins over Thanksgiving weekend.

She’s also obsessed with feeding Thor cat and giving him kisses when it’s time to say bye bye.

One thing hasn’t changed a bit: Our little girl LOVES to explore, and if she’s really interested in something will stick with it for a while. The other day she spent a good 20 minutes pulling every last box of pasta, bag of rice, and can of beans out of our corner kitchen cabinet. Mess? Who cares. Yay for independent play!

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Our last wine country getaway included a tiny, 2.5-month old Melina. While toting her around to various wineries and even patio seating at a fancy, square-side restaurant in downtown Healdsburg was pure joy as parents of a newborn, this year we decided to leave her home with Grandma and Grandpa Weiss so we could enjoy our first uninterrupted weekend alone in almost 18 months.

Yes, it was fabulous. Yes, we did talk about the Jelly Bean (and Kai), but not the whole time. Yes, I did call my mom to see how she was doing, but only twice in two days. Yes, Melina and my folks had a blast, though it sounds like she took a little longer to warm up to Grandpa than Grandma.

We had two fabulous dinners in Napa (one by candle and holiday lights on the patio of Bleaux Magnolia, and the other at Celedon in the old Grist Mill). And we tasted a fair amount of wine. Along with most local-ish folks, we’ve firmly solidified that Highway 29 is “the Disneyland of wine country,” overcrowded, over-priced, and while fun on a certain level just not quite what we we’re seeking.

Francis Ford Coppola’s gorgeous and tasty winery has been re-named Rubicon and now charges $25 a head for tasting and a tour – so you can’t even opt to split. So many tourists swarmed V. Sattui’s picnic lawn it looked like it had been over-run with giant ants. Luckily we did enjoy a more subdued cheese and wine pairing at one of our favorites, Paraduxx, on the Silverado Trail.

And the next morning we visited two wineries (Artesa and Folio) in the Carneros Valley that made up for all of Saturday’s fluff. Artesa sits high on a hilltop overlooking the bay. Several angular fountains lead up to the large, post-modern tasting room. The service was friendly, the pours generous, and the wine delicious.

We ended up joining our first wine club here – it’s under an hour’s drive from Berkeley, after all, and picking up our quarterly shipments will give a good excuse for day trips to wine country. I have grand visions of inviting a couple friends to join us for complimentary tastings on the terrace, while the kids explore all the fountains without annoying the other patrons…. Hey, anything’s possible, right?

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With food, of course! (And apologies to Krista for subconsciously taking your blog post title – it’s just too appropriate.) A couple weeks ago our play/moms group decided to do a repeat performance of last October’s photo shoot at Sears.

At that time not a single baby was sitting up solo, which meant the coolest shot ever was of all of them lying on their backs in a circle, 10 little heads facing inward. (See below.)

In a full year we’ve only lost one (ok two – baby and mom) member of our group. Very cool. But the kiddos are all incredibly mobile now, so instead of Sears we decided to do the photo shoot at a local park. For two hours the kids played and the photographer photographed.

Towards the end we decided to organize and put all nine toddlers (ages 16-17 months) on a bench for the official group shot. Melia’s daddy Ryan took some funny video (scroll to the bottom of the post) of how this all went down. I’m still amazed we got them all quiet and still for even a few minutes. Annie’s Bunny Love cereal and goldfish to the rescue!

I’m a little disappointed that the photog didn’t seem to spend much time on Meli. (It’s the mama bear in me, I’m sure.) We didn’t get many super-smiley shots of our super-smiley girl. But there were a few sweet ones, and I’ve posted them here. Enjoy.

And take a look at how much all the kids have changed since last October’s circle shot. By complete coincidence, Melina is between the same two kids she was a year ago. Can’t you tell?

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I can’t let today pass without at least saying something brief about the overwhelming significance of this election. All the obvious remarks go without saying. I mean, even five-year-old Kai had the talking points down: “We want Obama to win because he gives money to schools and health care. McCain is bad because he gives money to war.”

We watched the results from the living room of our friends, the Zarlings. We stuck around with two uber-tired kids long enough to hear both speeches. As Kai sat in my lap watching McCain’s concession, I said “Look – he’s not a sore loser. He’s congratulating Obama, and that’s the right thing to do.” By the time Obama appeared in victory, Kai’s eyes were heavy, and my own body felt overwhelmed by pride, relief, and joy. How wonderful is it that Kai and Melina will never remember a time when a black person can’t become president, or when a woman (all politics aside – and there are plenty of them!) can’t run for one of the nation’s highest offices. It’s about time.

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This month, we’ve noticed Melina’s personality coming into fuller bloom. As always, she’s a super happy, friendly girl. Her favorite things these days include drawing, stickers, the see saw at the park, any book featuring animals, bananas, or colors, and any dog or cat she meets on the street. She’s obsessed with feeding Thor, even when his bowl is full. She has a new stuffed dog (Baby Ein) that rivals Chop Eater and her little blankies as snuggle toys.

Melina also loves her brother’s wheeled school backpack, almost as much as she loves Kai himself. Kai sometimes lets her roll it all the way from his classroom to the car. At this point, I think she thinks it’s hers. She now also drags her own lunch bag behind her on the way to daycare, and is oblivious to the lack of wheels.

Melina seems to like order, as much as a 1-year-old can. She knows her stuffed animals and blankies belong on the wine fridge when she eats, not in the booster seat with her at the table. She follows directions well (when she’s not testing limits) and likes to put things back where she found them. Then take them out again. She also tends to bring us things that look fragile. But all bets are off with popup books and their tempting tabs, just waiting to be pulled off the page.

She can point out a handful of body parts, including her belly, knees, ears, and nose. When I say “little girl?” she points to herself. She also likes giving herself kisses in full-length mirrors. One teacher at daycare recently said, “She’s pretty quiet, isn’t she? Very busy, though.” She’s definitely an explorer, and in new situations seems to take things in for a while before jumping into action.

Nevertheless, she has tons of words, and one phrase: “Up pppuh!” (“Up, please!”) and likes to climb into and up just about anything – including our wine rack. (Good thing Grandpa bolted it to the wall!) Her latest game is to “lock” herself into a room, then knock on the door saying “knock knock!” (which sounds like “not not!”) until we open it. Then she shuts it and starts all over again.

We’re starting to see her turn into a bit of a night owl. Ok, that may be a stretch since she usually goes to bed at 8pm. But while her 5-year-old brother hits the pillow at the same time and goes straight to dreamland, Meli babbles herself to sleep – and sometimes uses the walls for a drum concert – nearly every night, regardless of whether Kai is with her in the room or not. (He’s learned to ignore her – or join in – instead of complaining.) She also seems to pick up steam right after dinner and bath. And of course, we remain incredibly fortunate in that she’ll sometimes sleep until 9am on weekends. Not always, but it’s not unusual.

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With just two days left to go before the election, my writing buddy Pamela decided to organize an Obama Mamas phone party on Sunday. She invited a bunch of moms, dads, and toddlers to her family’s SF home, where half the adults took the kids to the park, and the other half of us stayed behind to make calls to swing state voters on behalf of the Obama campaign.

I got through a list of 25 Ohio voters. About a third of the numbers were disconnected or wrong (including one being a Starbucks), and we all left voice messages on at least half our numbers.

I did connect with a handful of voters, including a couple elderly folks. (Ages are listed on the call sheet.) When I asked the first who she would be supporting on Tuesday she responded: “Well, I’m a democrat.” (implied: Obama, duh!) The second was a man who had to step away for a minute to turn down the TV volume. He came back and said “Sorry, I was watching the Browns.” When I asked who he’d be supporting on Tuesday he said “Obama, of course. We had a vigil for him this morning and will again on Tuesday. My daughter’s taking me to vote, it’s just three minutes away at the high school. Yes, Obama’s the man…”

Thank you for your time, sir. As Pamela would say, “Saving the world one phone call at a time.”

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Some adults get really into Halloween. I have two answers this. One I’ll borrow from a co-worker, who the other day said something like “I spend the entire year being so creative in so many ways and for so many occasions. This just isn’t one of them.” The other, of course, is “It’s all about the kids!”

We had a jam-packed Halloween afternoon and evening. Kai started celebrating early: Kids Club after school program had parties on both Thursday and Friday afternoons. For our part, Melina and I spent Halloween afternoon at a “not-so-spooky” party for tots at hands-on Habitot museum. We met up with friends Suli and Mikaela who joined Meli playing with ghost dough, slime, and a bean bag toss.

We met Daddy for a quick beer at Jupiter across the street, then picked up Kai and headed to our monthly play group potluck – complete with trick-or-treating! Kai’s mom even joined us for half of our walk down the block. It only took Meli two houses to catch on to the whole trick-or-treat routine, and Kai served the role of proud big brother, teaching her to run from one house to the next and to pick exactly two candies from each bowl.

Luckily, she has no idea that her prized collection is actually super tasty treats. We’ll hold off another year before introducing her to the sugary side of trick-or-treating.

Happy Halloween, everyone!

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Yesterday we ventured over to Ray’s Pumpkin Patch for some photo opps and over-priced pumpkins. We’ve gone to Ray’s (which is a tot-sized lot on Solano Ave) every year since Kai was two – and every year I think, “This just isn’t as exciting as last year’s photos made it look. Next year let’s go to a real patch where the pumpkins are still attached to the vines, the kids can climb a haystack, and we can all go on a wagon ride.” We’ll see if I manage remember this next year.

We picked up another family tradition when Kai was two: Every October since I can remember my mom has baked and decorated pumpkin-shaped sugar cookies. Now, she brings the naked cookies along with frosting, food coloring, candy corn, and raisins to Berkeley so that Kai, and now Meli, can frost and decorate their very own. Kai has gotten much more artful recently, and yesterday even added a green stem to each pumpkin. Meli’s cookies, on the other hand, look like Kai’s a few years ago: a mountain of candy corns!

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Kai had a really funny way of describing his cereal-eating habits yesterday:

“I eat my cereal like a pyramid. I start with three kinds, then for the next bowl have two, then just one. If I’m really hungry I start with four, so it’s a bigger pyramid.”

This struck me as not only funny but a brilliant little bit of metaphorical thinking for a 5-year-old. Of course, he is my step-kid. Kai based his comment on our house guideline of no more than three cereals at once (otherwise it really does get out of control), and his voracious morning appetite.

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More than huge leaps in physical development, Melina’s 16th month has been all about developing – and learning – her own little routines.

Toddler commute. Meli loves to bring everyone their shoes when she knows we’re about to leave the house, and she mostly manages to get the right shoes to the right people. On days we take Kai to school first, she knows we usually stick around and read with him and his classmates. One day we said good-bye to Kai at the classroom door and Meli was not pleased. On the other end of the day, I sometimes take her to toddler swim at BHS, which is on the way to Kai’s school. Now whenever we drive by the BHS parking lot between her school and Kai’s, she points towards the gym and speaks in expressive babble. Can a one-year-old have a sense of direction? Regardless of time of day, Meli enjoys “dancing” to certain songs from her car seat. Her latest favorite is a tune from The New Pornographers. (Kai, on the other hand, is really into the Foo Fighters. Haha.)

Mealtime. Our girl refuses to eat snacks when she knows meal time is soon. She also gets mad if we try to placate her hunger with leftovers while waiting for something to finish cooking or cool. She always seems to know the real deal is near. She uses a spoon pretty well with yogurt and oatmeal, and holds out her bowl or plate – along with her utensil – when she wants more food. When she dumps it upside-down or throws it on the floor, obviously she’s done. Big news: Our little girl finally found a non-pureed veggie she likes – spinach!

Bath time. Meli loves “bath bath” and has a whole set of rituals around it. She helps bathe her brother (but not yet herself) and likes to fill squishy spike ball with water. When she’s ready to come out she likes to play with the drain plug and eventually lets the tub fully drain. Sometimes she’ll stack all the toys in the bath basket, and she usually gets mad when we actually pull her out of the tub. She likes to mimic us putting on her lotion: She dabs the bottle top on her hand then rubs her palm all over her belly. She asks for her toothbrush (by pointing) then sits on Kai’s stool to gnaw on the brush for a while. Sometimes she’ll actually vibrate her whole head (instead of the brush) to really clean her teeth – or so we hope.

Bedtime. “Hop Hop” (Hop on Pop) is still a favorite, along with The Very Busy Spider and a set of big, bright Babies First Words books. Melina still has a hard time sitting through a full story without pulling out the next – or flipping through one book as we read from a different one. Sometime in the month since I fully weaned her, we developed a new bedtime routine: We go around the house and say “good night” to the rooms, the toys, the books, and the furniture. By the time we get to her crib she’s usually ready to grab her two blankies and Chop Eater, roll over, and stick her butt in the air for a super slumber.

And just plain play. She runs all over the place, most often when chasing her brother or playing peek-a-boo with a friend. She can stack several blocks and put stack rings on a stick, and likes to toss a ball back and forth, especially in a swimming pool. She gets a kick out of walking backwards – most often to seat herself on a stool or a curb, but sometimes just because it’s kinda fun. She loves to climb, and thinks standing on top of something like a chair or box is much more interesting than standing on the ground. And she gets mad when she can’t keep up with her brother on the big kid monkey bars at the playground or his school.

Oh – and take a look at Melina’s play group a year ago. Part of the group is in the shot above, all grown up and toddler-like.

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