Monaloca

Hints of fall have started to touch the air: today Berkeley is all high fog and cool breezes. The crisper weather reminds me how fortunate I was to have a summer baby. What would I do without our daily marathon-like walks to all corners of the city?

Some of my new-mom friends have just returned to work, and before long others will join them. I’ve always planned to restart my contract in mid-November, but as of today we still don’t have childcare lined up. Never mind that we paid application fees last February for three daycares. Apparently nine months might not be enough lead time for a spot. Today I found out we’re still number six on the waitlist at our top-choice center. Another told me “maybe in January” and the third hasn’t returned my calls. Hmmm… maybe we don’t want Meli there after all.

In the meantime, we’re still having fun around town. Just last Friday Melina had her first swim “class” at the Berkeley High warm pool (see pic). She was completely wide-eyed at the whole experience!

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On Saturday our little girl reached three months, which apparently is a time of growth leaps and developmental bounds. She’s no longer a newborn, but a full-fledged, smiling Gerber baby.

Some of Melina’s personal tricks of late (both individually achieved and parent-induced) include:

• She has near-complete neck control. Just look at her sitting in the Bumbo chair, and in the Ergo carrier with Joey!
• We purchased a BOB jogging/trail stroller that she uses without the infant carrier seat. We’ll still use the Snap ‘n Go and carrier for errands around town, but the BOB will be a much nicer ride for long walks and hikes, and was great for our trip to Tilden Park’s Little Farm and Jewel Lake today.

  

• This morning she rolled over for the first time! She was having some tummy time with me playing with her legs and helping her roll from front to back then back to front. I then left her alone for a spell and voila – she flipped from belly to back all on her own! It didn’t seem to phase her in the least, and I’m not sure it will happen again any time soon, but it was still very exciting.
• She’s all mouth and hands… She gabs and blabs a ton, loves to suck on her fingers and fists, and holds onto anything within close reach.

  

• She still an incredible night sleeper, often going from 7pm to 5am without a peep, then again til 8am after an early morning snack.
• She laughs. Not little giggles but big, throaty, straight-from-the-belly LAUGHS. It’s awesome. Joey made her laugh first about a week ago, simply by making silly sounds. Now she belts them out for everything from funny words to physical activity to me pulling the vibrating elephant on her play gym. This new trick of hers is my personal favorite, hands down.

  Hear her chuckles on youtube!

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On Sunday we hosted a Labor Day weekend BBQ for a bunch of our new-parent friends – mostly people I’ve met through several moms groups.

Melina got to hang out with buddies from my pre-natal yoga class that she’s “known” since she was in utero (see four of them lined up in the pic – they have a two-month age range but are all almost the same size!), plus some new friends from a faciliated group we’ve been attending. It was a great occasion to get all the dads together, too!

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Late last week I had an appointment in San Francisco so left Jelly Bean home with Daddy for the afternoon. They had a blast, reading stories, playing with games from Daddy’s store (see image) and of course changing a poopy diaper or two. I also had a great time relishing the late summer sunshine at the Ferry Building and taking a long walk without a stroller. I felt a little naked at first, but got used to it pretty quickly and was back with the little girl within a few hours. Oh – and she seems to be off her bottle strike (yippee!) – at least for now.

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Next month I have a short story, “Salt Melts Like Snow,” coming out in an anthology called Hot Flashes 2: More Sexy Little Stories & Poems. Linda and Laurie, the fantastic duo of editors, held a celebratory reading at Book Passage in Marin on Saturday evening. We had my folks lined up to babysit both Melina and Kai so that Joey and I could schmooze in peace with the other writers and enjoy some sexy little readings over a yummy array of wine, cheese, and fruit. A date night and personal literary landmark in one – fabulous!

Jelly Bean had a different idea. Two days earlier, about a week shy of her three-month birthday, she went on a bottle strike. Overnight our rockstar bottle feeder from three weeks old realized that silicone and flesh feel different, and that she most certainly prefers mommy’s nipple or no nipple at all. So instead of leaving her to scream at my parents once feeding time came, we put her in a nice summer dress and took her to her first literary event.

It was still fabulous, perhaps moreso. Everyone doted on Melina, I re-met a writer acquaintance who recently had twin boys (we discussed forming our own “writing mamas” group), and deep down I was proud to share my work with my 12-week-old daughter regardless of her not understanding a word.

For her part, Melina did just fine. Of course she pooped twiced but discreetly, and decided a quiet room full of people listening to a reading was a great time to practice her loud “aaaaaa” and “gaaaaa” sounds – but Daddy just took her for a walk or three. They both got to hear me read, and since then I’ve spent more and more time reading age-appropriate stories to little Meli. She’s enraptured by Dr. Suess (“Mr. Brown Can Moo” and “Hop On Pop”) and the classic “Good Night Moon,” among others.

Feel free to read my story here, but please also consider purchasing the anthology. Just contact me and I’ll set you up with a copy next month!

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Before Melina was born I made reservations at the Irish Rose Inn, a family-friendly B&B just outside Healdsburg. Kai was going camping with his mom for the full weekend, so we figured what better time to get out of town on our own for the first time with the wee one. I was a little nervous about crying spells in such an “adult” venue but am happy to report that, outside of traffic on the way up (I also wanted to cry) and a little due to the heat, Jelly Bean was a super star!

Our B&B host, Kris, adored her. “What a good baby! I like them when they get to be three months. She must be advanced.” (Yup, like all proud parents we think the same of her mere 2.5 months.) Hosts and other guests at various wineries either ignored her (haha) or kept commenting on how cute she was. We seemed to make friends with any baby or parent we met.

For her part, Melina was fascinated by the downtown Healdsburg plaza, with its huge trees, slight breeze, and rustling leaves. She also got to watch dusk fall for the first time as we dined on an outdoor terrace around 8pm.

Highlights for the adults included the spectacular grounds of Ferrai-Carano (see photos), a visit to the new Francis Ford Coppola winery called “Rosso & Bianco,” and the mellow wine caves and picnic grounds at Bella.

The topper was dinner on Saturday night. Kris got us last-minute reservations at Dry Creek Kitchen, a spectacular dining experience right on the main square. I loved the arugula salad with peaches and goat cheese, and the chocolate croissant bread pudding with Guinness ice cream (yes, as in the stout) was unbelievably perfect in texture (firm but not too dense), taste (a soft bittersweet), and portion size (small but delightfully rich). Our bill was surprisingly reasonable, as we’d been advised to bring our own bottle of Sonoma county wine for free corkage. And Melina’s slight fussing didn’t matter, since we sat outside in the midst of the town’s 150 year celebration of its founding. When she started to squirm I just picked her up and danced to the music and merriment that pervaded the plaza.

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My mom, whose name is Nancy, always wanted a nickname. So she named her first child (me!) Laralynn and chose Lynn as my nickname. I’ve always hated having a nickname (sorry, Mom) and especially one without an obvious foundation. (ie, Joey comes from Joseph. Lynn could just as easily be standalone, but in my case it’s not. For some reason I want people to know that, so sometimes go by Laralynn but most often by Lynn… not to be confusing or anything.)

I never intended on using a nickname for my own daughter, but as anyone with kids knows fun family names often appear spontaneously and take on lives of their own. Here’s the rundown for our little Jelly Bean.

The official: Jelly Bean or Pumpkin Pie
The personalized: Melina Bean or Meli Belly
Standard deviations: Pumpkin Pie Spice, Little Pumpkin, or just plain Pumpkin
The mix: Jelly Bean Pie
Action-based: “Hi Smiles,” “Hi Tongue,” or Monkey as in “You’re being a fussy-monkey”
On rarer occasions Bug, Boo, or Bugaboo
And the obvious: Munchkin

On a side note, Jelly Bean’s favorite toys these days are her security blankets (we have three of Lynette’s Swaddle Designs we rotate through the wash) and her own hands. She loves to suck on both!

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On Sunday we trekked over to the peninsula for friend Donovan’s second birthday party followed by his parents’ housewarming party.

Melina loved watching and listening to the many tree leaves rustle in the wind, and Kai had fun with a bubble machine explosion (bubble soap everywhere!) right before it was time to put on his jammies and head back to Berkeley.

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Last week we had another visit from out-of-staters. Kai was extra excited because his friends Joy and Linnea – flower girls to his ring bearer at our wedding – were part of the crew that also included Sarah (my friend since we were six) and her partner Kari.

Our Portland-based pals had season passes for science museums, so we headed to SF for a visit to the Exploratorium and a picnic at the visually compelling Palace of Fine Arts, just outside the museum.

Sarah and I both had fond memories of the museum from when we were kids. Luckily, we weren’t disappointed. I don’t think many of the exhibits have changed in 25 years, and even four-year-olds Kai and Joy had a blast making hand impressions in a large bed of nails and tipping a huge tube of sand and water from head to toe.

After we left I realized I had missed a great opportunity to play with my camera and take some artsy fartsy shots: adobe-colored columns pushed against an atypically blue sky, and flocks of seagulls and strollers dotted the path around a small lake. We’ll have to return one day soon, as this visit was all about family time and fun with friends.

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Pictures like this leave me wondering what happened to our tiny newborn. Melina is already starting to look so “grown up” – a real Gerber baby!

I’m also happy to report some pretty amazing sleep patterns for a 10-week-old. She’s not only sleeping through the night in technical terms (which is six hours), but for the past few nights has been down from around 7:30pm to 5am without waking to eat. After a little snack she’ll sleep another couple hours. Yippee!

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