On Saturday we leave for a last pre-baby vacation: a road trip along the California coast. We’re starting in Big Sur, then will make our way up to Point Reyes Station and finally to Mendocino, where we’ll stay with friends Milo and Cassandra and baby (oops, she’s a toddler now!) Julia. I’m very excited about this time away, the chance to be mellow, hike, read or write by a fire while sipping tea, and just BE with my husband without the interruptions of daily life.

Before I got pregnant we were planning a trip to Japan this spring. Even after the stick showed us two pink lines for positive, we planned to make the trip in my second trimester, right around now, as a last international fling before baby. Then morning sickness hit – in fact it completely floored me – Joey opened his store, and eventually we decided that it might be best to stay a little more local for this final solo getaway.

Travel and adventure have always been such an important part of my life that it’s a little scary to think about how much of it I’ll be giving up, at least for the next few years while our child is very young. I know we’ll continue to travel, and will seek plenty of international destinations, but a tiny part of me still craves the autonomy of just a few years ago, when the only person I had to answer to was myself and the world was my playground. Of course, sometimes it did feel like a very lonely playground.

One of my co-workers is a month ahead of me in her pregnancy. A few weeks ago she mentioned, “I’m definitely starting to nest.” She’s cleaning out the baby’s room, knitting blankets, and admits, “I just don’t have the same desire to go out anymore.?”

Since Kai came into my life almost three years ago and we bought the house over two years ago, I’ve been in a half-nest situation, too. The nest is comforting. And so is the reality that we’re able to initiate happy hours, go out for adult-only dinners, and take short jaunts abroad from time to time.

Not going to Japan isn’t as disappointing as I thought it would be. Yet here I am writing about it, so I know I’m not completely sold on a life of complete domesticity. I’m sure my attitude will change – many times in the coming months, and more completely over time.

In the meantime, all I can say is: I hope baby likes to travel!

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